Religion

June 23, 2014 at 8:33 am | Posted in Da Ritzenator | 1 Comment
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religionBefore there was anything, there was God. He is the sole creator of everything there is (like the bull of the universe). Religion is the belief in Him, through faith, and offerance (offerancenot a word) of your undying love, praise and devotion. Some people claim that He’s not real (yup), that there is no proof of His existence (yup), or that it is just a man-made story to control the feeble minded or help others sleep at night (yup, yup). But that’s the selfish side of religion (wait…that doesn’t make sense). When you accept Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior (quite the title), and pledge your love, loyalty and service to him (he wants all that? Sounds like he’s a selfish jerk), your reward will be peace, comfort, and confidence (so god is just weed and alcohol). But you can only achieve this salvation if you let him come into you (be sure to use protection). Once he’s taken over your thoughts and being (sounds a bit sinister…), you will connect with what is right, and know true life and all it has to offer. All of your sin will be washed away, and your soul will be pure (I don’t think you can be considered pure if you “let him in”). But you must always praise Him and only Him, let the spirit in (with enough spirits, it’s possible I’d let him in) and have Him fill you with love (I guesslove” is another name for it). If you do, and it is an honest and true commitment, your Joy (if that’s her name) will be everlasting and eternal (So just Joy forever and ever? Sorry, I’m out. I need variety). – Da Ritzenator (comments by site editor)

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