Tort ReformMarch 8, 2010 at 12:26 pm | Posted in The Knave | 4 Comments
Tags: Tort Reform
Tort laws address injuries suffered by a person in situations where there is no contractual relationship. For example: Party A is a doctor and Party B comes into her office to have a boil treated. While Party B is sitting on the examination table, Party A decides to show off a new trick she is learning involving the juggling of sticks of butter and running chainsaws. Something goes horribly wrong and then Party B goes crying to the courts for money because he thinks a new plasma television will help him come to terms with having fewer limbs than prior to meeting Party A and by the way, the boil is still there and growing.
The current talk about tort reform among pantywaists and milksops is a proposal to help lower medical costs in the United States of America by putting caps on medical malpractice lawsuits. But such tort reform is just another government regulation and would do little to lower costs. Those who are not namby-pambies and spineless gutless weaklings know that to truly lower medical costs, what is needed is less government, not more. To take this to its logical conclusion, the only true tort reform is tort elimination.
Get rid of the tort laws and allow the invisible hand of the Free Market to gently hold your sensitive areas as you turn and cough. Why are visits to the doctor so expensive? First, it is expensive to train a doctor and takes a very long time. A doctor has to know much more than is really necessary to get in, get out, and get paid in pretty much every circumstance. Second, due to the doctor’s knowledge, she has to practice defensive medicine. This is when a doctor performs extraordinary tests and procedures on every patient, just on the off chance that there is some medical problem other than the obvious. A less knowledgeable doctor wouldn’t know about other possibilities and could therefore save everyone a lot of money. Third, if the doctor doesn’t perform defensive medicine, tort laws can be used to show that the doctor did not do everything possible to avoid injury to the patient and subsequent legal prosecution can lead to persecution through the awarding of damages. Tort reform by eliminating tort law would reduce tort litigations to zero, thereby completely solving the problem of excessive judgments for damages. There would be no money wasted on defensive medicine, because the doctor could not be sued and therefore would only do the bare minimum for a patient. The doctor would not have to waste so much time being educated and interning, because there would not be any material consequences to just learning as he goes. Two simple words provide a clear replacement for all tort laws
The Free Market will ensure that good doctors get more patients and therefore more profit, while the bad doctors will go out of business. If a patient goes to a doctor who cuts off the wrong leg, it is probably because the patient did not do enough research before purchasing leg removal services. Why should the doctor be punished by the courts, i.e. the government, for learning one of life’s little lessons? If the patient is not satisfied, he can post a bad review online and the doctor is sure to lose patients, and therefore money and therefore will have been punished by the Free Market. To avoid this, the doctor may well try again and remove the correct leg for free. She’s bound to get it right the second time if only by process of elimination and will likely do better next time someone wants a leg chopped off. A doctor who cuts off the correct leg 95% of the time will get paid more than one who is only 50/50. If you go to that 50/50 doctor, because you can’t afford the better one, negotiate a contract beforehand. Contract law would still exist with the elimination of tort law, but make sure you negotiate a good deal before you let the doctor remove that bullet from your femoral artery. If the doctor won’t agree to your terms, find one that will. If the infection around the gunshot wound in your leg starts to smell and contract talks with a seventh doctor break down, just do the procedure yourself. Self-amputation will stop that gangrene and save you a gang of green $$$$.
With the Free Market in control, however, it is unlikely anyone would ever face the above situation. There would be such an explosion in the number of doctors that they would be lining up to cut the lead out of your thigh and at amazing prices. Without any fear of legal interference and financial ramifications, citizens would increase the supply of medical service providers by declaring themselves doctors en masse and thereby bring down the costs through competition. Strip away all of the government certification requirements (they’re unnecessary as no one can sue anyone for not having them anyway) and everyone can perform a medical procedure for a fee. Traditional fully trained doctors would still make the most money, since they would have the best services and results, but anyone who saw a YouTube video on how to remove an appendix could charge maybe $50 at a discount surgery shop. Any discount shop would do the best it could in price or quality of service or go out of business to other shops staffed by people who had seen that same video.
The Market will regulate itself. Poor people will be motivated by their poor options to work harder or will have to settle for what they can afford. Discount medical centers for any number of specialties will spring up across the country and all of these small businesses will lead to innovation that will reshape and reform America into the nation its Founders hoped it would become. If the Surge-o-rama Appendix and Gall Bladder Removal Factory has a survival rate of 40% and its competitors are only 20% successful, it will be more profitable and maybe its employees will even be able to afford some of that fancy book learning the doctors get. The business will grow, cut costs, gain volume discounts, franchise, etc. Maybe they’ll provide a 30% survival rate appendix removal at $19.95 with a free a gall bladder exam or a deluxe 50% survival rate extraction of any two organs of the customer’s choice. The Surge-o-rama could diversify into making higher quality appendix removal videos they could post on YouTube to recruit higher quality neo-doctors, thereby increasing the health of the nation, while making a profit and reinvesting and innovating, etc….
This wonderful world where every man, woman, child and helper monkey can grow up to be a doctor—free from the shackles of tort law that would hold them responsible for any incompetence causing harm to their patients—simply by adding two letters before or after his, her, or its name can become reality through the tort reform of tort elimination.
(Before you ask, yes, you can add two letters to both sides of your name, Dr. Bubbles the Chimp, M.D.) – The Knave